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What's on my mind?

What's on my mind?

Wednesday, June 16, 2010


This year's start has been emotionally trying- every month, January- current, there was always something. I am learning to do things alone with a better outlook about it. If I had a guy with me, it'd be difficult to socialize. If I had a female friend, there could be underlying competition. I don't roll like that- I'm talking about her. It occurred to me that my circle of 'friends' are not totally infinite when you actually think about a circle- no beginning, no end. Friends are very hard to come by and I'm working on that. They are out there. And I have to shout more: here I am. Trust me. I'm good for you.

Recently, I have been mistreated and disrespected. These actions were uncalled for. It hurt me something terrible. I'm not an emotional person but I shedded a tear or two, stressing myself to wonder what I'd done wrong. You ever do something nice and get dogged out for it? Or you do a slew of good deeds only to have certain folks forget them AND YOU? Or you get snapped on with the sarcastic tone because you were either misunderstood or folks have reading issues? I told someone that I'd lay low for a bit and he asked why. I explained that no matter what I do, I get slack for it. It's that 'I cant win for sht' feeling. He said I shouldnt' feel that way and not to change who I am. I felt slightly better and this will take some time.

I am a good person and always try to be- therefore imma be alright.... so what are ya gonna do about it?

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